Backfire!

Apparently, I have some overseas readers. They saw my post "Poems and Haiku" and recognized Rob the Douche from their local Church community.

In the middle of service this morning, a teenaged boy, stood up, thrust a pointed finger into the crowd and yelled as loud as the vaulted ceilings could carry his sqeaking voice, "TERRORIST!" to which everyone turned and replied, "WHERE?"

Following his outstretched hand, they found Rob sitting with his wife, also wondering where the Terrorist was. Suddenly realizing everyone was looking at him, he lifted his massive frame, rubbed his balding and shaved scalp, and hid his wife behind him. Two laymen approached him, grabbed him by his thick forearms and attempted to escort him from the service. It is rumored that another church member overheard his wife mumble, "I knew it."

Rob was questioned by the authorities, over a spot of tea, and subsequently released due to lack of evidence. They discovered that Rob actually lived a life of peace, honor, community service and loyalty; quite far from the tennents of terrorism at large.

In fact, Rob is one of the best and most loving friends another man can have without being gay. He is selfless, hardworking and extremely durable. I have done a huge disservice to this man, and to that I am in his debt. I hope he will still let me crash at his place when I visit him.

Therefore, Rob is not a Douche.